I know that Jazzi told ya all about our BIG fight. Well...she has this exaggeration issue. Here's how it really went. The water bowl that we both share is to the left of her food bowl, (She forgot to mention that part) anyways I had just gotten a drink and was sitting there listening to the peeps chit chat, ya know how that can be?
Along comes Miss bossy and she stops and gives me one of those goofy looks that she likes to throw around. What, like I am posta be scared!!! I told her to chill a minute and that I would get outta her way, remember the peeps were both right there and there wasn't much room.
When all of a sudden, she just bullied her way in and she attacked me!! So began the fight began. I wasn't gonna let some bully Scottie run ruff shot over me so there was lots of serious biting and growling going on and we were rolling around on the ground.
I could have taken her easily but being the nice sister I didnt. Since she is shorter, she scratched me under neath, I am sorry but private parts area should be off limits ya know?? It did take both of them to pull us apart and when they did, I was still making my points to Miss Bossy. You don't realize how hard it is to live with Miss bossy pants.....Geezzz...the things I have to tolerate!!
Once we got out of our confinement, we played ok together the rest of the day but....we did keep an eye on each other!! I HAD to make sure that she wasn't gonna try and take my bone from me!! I could see her eye-ing it, do you see it too?
Today, me and Addi had our first fight. It was not a fun clowning around fight either. Here's what happened: Here is Addi and note right in front of "my" food bowl.
Here I come along and want a few munchies and I stop to evaluate the situation. I give Addi the ole move outta the way "eye" look and she doesn't budge at all. We have a stare down and still there she sits. ummmmm
Ok, I will be the bigger dog and just politely go around her to get to my food bowl. Well....Miss Dog-zilla didn't like that one bit and she attacked me!! I must add that Mom and Dad were standing between me and Addi chit chatting. So..anyways...the fight began. First Addi started biting me and attacking me. There was NO way that I was gonna take this attack lying down!! Then there was lots of serious biting and growling going on and we were rolling around on the ground. Mom screamed cuz she was bare-footed and was worried about her toes, Hey!! what about me?? I mean this 70 lug was on little ole 19 lb me!! It took both of them to pull us apart and when they did, we both had our snarls on and still growling!!
I got sent to my bed and Addi got sent to the basement to as she says "Think about what we did" yah right!! I was just trying to protect myself. Later, we noticed what I did to Addi~~Look at those claw marks!! She may be BIG but I am the Boss round here and I don't take no guff from no one!!
We couldn't even play fight for the rest of the day. If we even started Mom says uhhh, uhhh and that we better knock it off!! Now her, I am scared of BOL!! Have any of you got in a serious fight with your siblings??
Welcome to Creative Table Snatching class.
I see everyone got here nice and early, that's cool.
I also see that there are BIG dogs in the front rows. Could you bigger dogs move to the back so the shorter ones can move to the front so they can see better? Come on, change seats. um...um...Mango, that means you!! Yes, I know you can scrunch down but you are still big, it will be OK Mango!! move to the back~~you can sit back by the Golden's, they are very friendly!! Everyone OK now??
OK... I, Jazzi am so excited about teaching y'all about table Snatching. I have had 6 yrs experience at it and have it down to a pretty good science now. Addi will be my assistant. I have some outlines and Addi, will you please paw those out to everyone?
Table Snatching 101
1. What to Snatch
2. When to Snatch
3. Proper Snatching Techniques
4. Timing of the Snatch
5. A Snatch gone Bad
6. What to do if......
OK, first we are gonna start out with.... 1. What to Snatch:
When you are snatching, it is important to know what to snatch. You want to watch and choose the foods that aren't messy that you can gobble down quickly with no evidence. Stay away from food with really messy sauces, foods that are very juicy, food with lots of syrup, jellies and powdered foods like powdered lemon bars, they leave powdered sugar all over your face. When you snatch, you certainly don't want the evidence all over your face. Trust me, you wont get away with it with a messy face!! Ex. of a messy face.
2. When to Snatch: There are several times that you can snatch. I would say that most of the time, the best time is after the peeps eat and they have left the room to talk, play etc. Believe me they always leave leftovers on their plates bol unless they are members of the Clean Plate Club!! But there are those times, before they eat that you can actually snatch. For instance one time Kim left a plate full of veggies and a baked potato on the table. She went upstairs to change the baby and put her into bed. Awww perfect!!! Those veggies and potato were so outta here when she came back downstairs BOL Watch to make sure you have enough time to Snatch before they return. Here is a good example: This dog watched and made sure the peeps were busy when he made his snatch.
3. Proper Snatching techniques:
When you are going to snatch, there is a system to go through. A. Once you spot your snatch you must look to the right and look to the left. B. You can snatch in bites. You sit and wait and so gently, snatch a bite at a time.
C. You can also just gander by, look innocent and then snatch it.
Here is Mango showing us how the innocent sniff sniff and POW!! that peach is toast.
4. Timing of the Snatch:
The main trick of the snatch is just watching for the right time. Here's Sweet William patiently waiting for Lee to leave so he can snatch that hot dog. Now that is a guy with real patience not to snatch right away!! It is all in the timing~~remember that.
Only snatch Before a meal, if....you have enough time, and after the peeps are outta the room. When you make your snatch don't pussy foot around, just get in there and get it and get out!! The quicker the better, slow will get you caught and put in the slammer!!
My cousin in Texas, Wrigley, has the timing down pat. When my Mom goes to Texas, she will fix a sandwich, on the cabinet, get all the goodies on it and she goes to put the stuff away in the fridge. Within that 3-4 seconds, Wrigley snatches the sandwich and demolishes it all at the same time!! BOL You would think that Mom would learn this but it happens every time. WTG Wrigley!! I don't have a picture cuz he is just way to fast!! 5. A Snatch gone bad:
I know from personal experience, this IS a snatch gone bad!! DON'T ever let this happen to you. This is NEVER a good thing!!
Here is that same dog that made the great snatch. He did two things wrong: He took more than he could chew and he stayed right there and got caught and LOOK what happened to him.
6. What to do if....I am gonna open this up to you all for suggestions or ideas. What would you do IF.....??
Ok Nola.....yah lay down and look gazingly like you know nothing!!
Um huh Bella, Go and watch TV, good!!
Yes Bertie, blame it on the other dog, nice!!
Yep Sasha, give em that sweet look like who me??? Works every time!!
Great Ruby, go and hide in the play tunnel!!
Murphy, great idea, go watch out the window!!
Good idea Stanley, fake asleep and nice touch with the stuffie right there, and always close your eyes and they will think you have been laying there quite awhile!!
Oh Benny and Lily got the right idea, RUN like there is NO tomorrow!!
Yep. nother great one Nola, just turn your head the other way!! Great!!
Aww....Goose, that's a good one too.....if you did snatch something messy, put a mask on and no one will ever know. Just tell em that your allergies are bothering you!!
Roxy is good at running too, I bet she has experience at this!!
Susie is good at settling in and faking sleep too. It helps to scrunch the pillows too FYI
Nice Ranger, just go all flat out. With a cute look like that, who could expect You???
yah Sweet William, good idea. Go and sit by the watermelon. If they get testy, just roll that watermelon at them!!
Recliners are always good too, Sidebite made sure that it wasn't even rocking either, that would be a dead giveaway!!
That is a great place for hiding Lily but....you might want to get that tush just a little more under the bed, I'm just saying.....
You all have such great ideas for What if....... I hope you have enjoyed my class and learned something that can help you. Now.....We have about 5 minutes before our moms come and I have a table FULL of tacos, so I say Lets Eat Tacos!!! Everyone on the table!!!